Posted by: guinness222 | October 26, 2005

Retail Maddness,…it’s here!

Well it’s that time of year again, the “Holiday Season”. It used to be the “Christmas Season”, but now it’s the politically correct “Holiday Season” instead. Another one of the “GONZO” items that used to be.
Ok so you’re not of the “Christmas” belief, that’s alright, then just ignore it, count it as a “freebie” day off, or to quote my grand daughter,..””Whatev'”, but let the rest of us enjoy OUR Christmas season!
I work for a retailer and we’ve been setting up for Christmas since the 1st of October. All the decorations and stockings, and red and green “Holiday” signs are firmly in place. I willl make the rash presumption that the lower than usual sales this year and the consumer confidence and spending patterns are the major reason we went from summer to Christmas (there! I said it the old way, so I’m not the real “PC” dude!)
Some “expert” or “analyst” figures we will subliminally “trap them” into thinking Christmas is even closer than they think and they’ll begin buying Christmas presents and allow the poor merchants to recover some of thier losses thus far in 2005!
But is it realistic? I may have to walk the walk and talk the talk, but it ain’t even close to Christmas yet, so why start buying now? I’ll miss the hustle bustle of the last minute “rush”, one of the real signs of Christmas. And more importantly are there really any “deals” out there or are we looking at the same retail bag of tricks, you know “Buy 1 get 6 free”, “25% off your second item” and all that other stuff.
And then there is “Black Friday”. First of all it has nothing to do with race. Historically that is the period when the old merchants would actually begin to make a profit for the year, or go from the use of red ink, for losses, to “black” ink for profits. So if the term “Black Friday” ofends you then go seee your shrink!
But they come in hoardes. It’s the closest thing I can imagine as an analogy of the landings on the beaches of Normandy in ’44. Never mind logic, never mond reason, but the “one upsmanship” of retailers. One across from me opens at 4:30 a.m.! And there are people lined up for the “early bird specials”or the limited essential “give a way” to drag you into the store, because after all you’re not getting up at three thirty to run down for one pair of slacks, or a polo shirt, so you’ll stay and “shop til you drop”.
The real “commando’s” would put Wilma Rudolpf to shame the way they race fromn store to store like the devil himself was breathing down thier neck. They open the door, instantly make contact with a clerk and then it’s “You got early bird specials?” And “where are they?” And “when do they go off sale?” They think for about three seconds, make a decision and either snag something and run for the cash register, or wiithout so much as a “thank’s” close the door and run to the next store for a repeat performance. These clowns will hit dozens of stores practically before the sun comes up, and spend the rest of the day gloating over the “deals” they found.
They park on the highway, in the street, in employee parking areas, it’s crazy,…but they drop a bunch of money.
Well time to headoff and do more “prep” work for the madness.
Since when does it make sense to be that “fanatical”?

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