Posted by: guinness222 | January 15, 2007

"There once was a lass from Nantucket, whose favorite phrase was ….."

Today class we will explore the heretofor infrequently practiced management theory of “Corporate Faith”. And GOD NO it doesn’t mean trust in Big Brother because sure as hell that is stupid! It does mean(almost a literal biblical translation from “Love one another as I have loved you”, in other words; If you ain’t got the balls to trust your employees and be the leader for them, then you sure as shit deserve what you get!
Call me naive as I sit here with about $10,000 in investments put away for retirement and a monthly Social Security check for about $1900 when I hit 65, couple that with about $1200 for the wife, and there we are. So what does that have to do with paragraph number one? I believe in Corporate Faith.
As the owner of a company, and everyone can do it, hell I’ve already got about seven of them under my belt, you have ONLY one objective,…sell the vision of what it can be. That’s it. Period. End of “deep meaningful philosophical statement”. For if you do your job and sell what it can be for your employees, to them, you will, no make that MUST succeed. At every level. I know because I’ve done it.
However most business owners don’t believe it, they are “profit driven” (old fashion translation “greedy”) the attitude is “screw the employee’s they are here to simply do what I tell them to do”. But you know what, that’s not true. Or maybe I am just a crazy old dude who should be put away.
Over the past week I watched my bosses grovel, I mean kiss ass so heavily it was amazing they could still breath, to “save” two accounts that they both know are not the profile of the accounts we want to have, nor the level of income we want, not the type of account that will let us do the job they hired us to do! So why did they do it, …for the money honey! They have turned down at least six other clients who want to go with us, and at least two that I’ve brought to them who have said “just do me up a contract, I’ll sign it”. Why? Beats the shit out of me,…guess I’m not in the “inner circle” enough to be privy to that.
As long as I had businesses (almost twenty-five years worth) I NEVER EVER had an employee leave me to start his/her own business and compete against me. Not once did I ever have an employee quit my company and go to work for a competitor of mine. And to this day I sleep well because I know in my heart I never screwed an employee!
The government, ..sure, that’s what the greedy bastards are there for. Shit if they see nothing wrong with paying $700 for a hammer and $1500 for a toilet seat, are they not asking for it! And big companies who overcharge to begin with, under deliver, and in general screw you over, sure,…no qualms of consciensness there at all. But never my people.
An example, when my restaurant business had about two months left before we literally hit the wall I gathered all my people and told them. I thanked them but told them it was not going to turn around, but as Captain of the ship I was riding it to the end, but they should go look for other jobs, and I would give everyone of them a great reccomendation. After a few minutes of quiet my cook raised his hand and said “What if I decide to stay on, what happens?” I told him I would pay him his wages until I had no money left to pay, and I’d let him know that as soon as I did. About ten minutes later they were all back at work like nothing happened. And I did pay everyone of them until the day there wasn’t a dime left in the till. It wasn’t thier fault, it was mine. I dreamed much bigger than I should have. I had to close a business that legitimately was making a $150,000 profit a year because the set up I designed and built (with no “back door” out) needed a $250,000 a year net profit to live and stay alive. This highlights one of my biggest failings in life, since I was a little kid,… I go for it, I never look for “fall back positions”, “back up plans”, “alternative methods”, “bailouts” etc.
Why? Because that was my job to plan it, execute it, sell it to others, and guide it into greatness. How much passion should you have for something, …no how about anything, if you are constantly developing “back up plans” and “soft landings” and that sort of thing? If you’re planning a “back up” inside you mind knows it ain’t gonna work, but I don’t have to worry, I got a “back door” (That term by the way comes from people who avoided other folks and bill collectors by running out the “back door” when they came to collect)
I don’t know how many people comment on me and my wife being married for 40 years this June! What’s the big deal? We both committed to make it succeed, and that means a shitload of hard work, more than anyone’s fair share of aggravation, and learning to know each other and most importantly where the “lines in the sand” are drawn.
For example, it should come as no suprise to any of you who know me from my rantings or my picture in the top left of this blog, that I like my guinness. Now there are always varying degrees of “like”. Is a day without Guinness a terrible day? You bet your ass! Is a day without a keg of Guinness a bad day,…nope, I’m getting to old for the hangovers, (and besides drinking that much beer I’d never get any sleep from having to get up to pee!) But there is a mid-point, a carefully learned level of “gentle relaxant”, and “shit faced” or as we Yanks call it, “a Buzz”. (I had to find it because my wife told me if I got stopped by the police there would be no bail, no attorney being called for me, and nothing to give me any hope of less than an ten to twenty years in an eight by ten foot room with “Bubba” and the fear of taking a shower and dropping the soap! Guess that’s a pretty clear “Line in the sand”!)
Back on point, most companies don’t want to invest in you, they simply want to use you like a ten dollar whore! Tell me I’m wrong! What has your company done of late for you that either the law or the union have not told them they must. (and I’m not talking about the “overtime” they pay you to give up “hours of your life”, Think about it.)
If you live to be 75 years old that is 657,000 hours you have on this earth. What do you think you’re worth? let’s break it down to simple math. that’s 8760 hours of your life in a single year, divide what you made last year by that amount, if you made $40,000 that means you are working for $4.57 an hour!! Check the math! So instead of just going home and having a glass of wine and watching my “clone”, Elliot, of Law and Order (ok girls, take a number, that’s why he’s out there and I maintain a quiet life style 🙂
You are going to make the $4.57 doing that, and a whooping half of that having fun working overtime. Now tie that into a boss who says “thank you” with the same gusto and enthusiasm as the muttered “excuse me” when they bump into someone, and again, think about it.
By the way, I said it before and here it is again. What does the anacronym “Job” really mean? Answer Just Over Broke!
So just how much are you worth? Take what you think you’re worth, divide it by 8760 (number of hours in a year) and there you go. Now if you feel bad about this number then divide it by 2180 (number of hours in a standard work week) you should feel better than ever, but gee more than 75% of your time per year on this earth you get paid nothing!! Bummer! But it’s your time to have fun and enjoy life, so do that and stop whining, or if you’ve got a few hours free, get another job! Or even better yet get your own business everyone has value, everyone has worth, the only problem is connecting the dots between them. I can honestly tell you I had no idea what I made per year when I owned my own businesses, and that’s the truth, and I’m sure you’ve heard the old story of the business man whose accountant came to him one day and said, “you know what,…you’re a millionaire” It has happened to me twice, but it’s only money.
Old Blue Eyes sums it up best;
Ive been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate,
A poet, a pawn and a king.
Ive been up and down and over and out
And I know one thing:
Each time I find myself flat on my face,
I pick myself up and get back in the race.

Get back in the race, but always be the lead horse it beats watching someone else’s ass in front of you all the time!


  1. Mr. G,

    What a way to put your life into perspective. It certainly makes you re-evaluate what’s important in life and what’s not…

    And how you spend your time!

    As always, I thoroughly enjoyed your post. You really ought to consider updating more frequently though… 😛 🙂

    Take care!

    And by the way, I think I fell in love with your wife over the “line” she drew in regards to your drinking Guiness. I absolutely *hearted* her response. You married one tough cookie – she must have had to be in order to keep you in line all these years! Hehe.

    (By the way, it’s me… Princess. I changed my posting name to my real name because Princess was just getting to generic. Even though I’ll always be my daddy’s princess! haha)

  2. Well, way to depress the hell out of my corporate little life 🙂

    But I’ve been terribly lucky that every single one of my managers (bar one, who we don’t speak of) has been exactly like you. Caring, empathetic and reasonable in what they expect from an employee, i.e. asking of me things that they would ask themselves.

    I second Amber and say you’re wife is a complete rockstar.

    (And stop bagging Elliot Alec or we may have to have words :))

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