Posted by: guinness222 | April 14, 2007

The phases of life!

Thus far a great day, in great measure because of my friend Jezzy and her blog. (See my sidebar for her link) Ok, it’s waxing philosophically time here in “the Pit”.
Jezzy, you touched a nerve, it’s been where I am now that’s been putting me in “blue funk” land, and a lot of the time I forget my own credo to “step back, smell the roses, and move up to a higher place in your mind and heart” life is a fleeting thing and he who takes it too seriously gets to the end and says “Is that it? Is That all there is?”,….because they missed it as they lived it. I tend to be the most guilty about that, if the truth be known.
Before you finish my this blog, please go read Jezzy’s, then come back.

Phase 1 – Carefree, wonderful fun, and unbridled enthusiasm. This is the 16th to 30th years of your life. (1 to 16 were just learning and accumulating “stuff”, advise from friends and parents, advise from teachers, advice from coaches, and advise from “best friends”.) Into the 15 years of the “carefree period” you begin to experiment with life, focus on anything within your line of sight, and particularly appearing in your mirror. You push to know exactly how many beers can I consume before I pass out (shit, I lost count and don’t remeber,..sigh, ..guess I’ll have to do it again!)My body just never fails me, by twenty three, or four, not a sign of a “beer belly”, and still strong as an ox without a worry of having to “work out”. And girls,….well they are out there like so many flowers waiting to be gathered up. Yeah we have to work, but that’s only “because”, because we need more money for beer, a faster sharper car, a “get-a-way” to the Islands to see what else is out there with my “buds” (mates in Australian talk I think). Now this phase is the foundations of our memories that will accompany us for the remaining years of our journey. It doesn’t “end” like a race, it sort of “mutates” beginning around 25 and shuddering it’s last breath at about thirty.
Mutation – a change from the original as required, dictated, or evolved in the journey of life

Phase 2 – I’m a responsible adult,..almost! This is where memories of carefree and wonderful become the padding in our lives to keep us moving forward despite reality beginning to intrude. Parenthood, better job, or uncontrolled urge to “go it on my own”, the old “bod” not cooperating as well as it used to (three beers and 9p.m. is a must to be “bright eyed and bushy tailed” for tomorrow, and monday through friday “parties” are an absolute no-no.) So what’s it going to take to make more and be able to get rid of the old futon and get a real bed, (maybe that’s why my back aches!) or how about a little better wardrobe, like maybe more that a drawer full of tee shirts and four pair of jeans, and thoughts like “sure would be nice, I mean really nice to find a real “soul mate” and settle in a bit. I guess girls really are women now and are more muti-functional” that I thought before. Oh and I know I’m not the one with the “biological clock”, but it might be nice some times to just hang out with my own kid, you know, throw a baseball, kick a soccer ball, go nutsy on some junk food. (sigh) gee I guess I am getting older.
(FLash forward a couple of years) “Honey, why’s the baby crying again I changed his diapers this morning when I woke up and it’s only noontime!” And then you sit down to be sure you have enough for you and your wife to take that weekend get-a-way when your sister comes to visit for a week,….”Honey, where did all the money go?” We seem to be paying a hospital full of Doctors all the time. My old dog Herbie never got this many shots and he turned out fine!”
“And how much does the baby eat anyway, the grocery bills have almost doubled”
“I guess we can skip the weekend away and just have the Johnson’s over for a cook out, he can bring the beer.”
Then phase 2 begins to wane beginning at about 40 or so. “Honey maybe we ought to think about joining a health club or something, you know? I just can’t drop this extra ten pounds and my jeans are shrinking or something. Are you using a new laudry detergent or something?”
“Oh and Bob and Mac asked me to go play golf with them Saturday morning, you don’t mind do you? I mean you are usually doing your shopping, and Little Bobby has that two day football camp thing this week end, and Laurie and her girl friends are all going to some party at the sorority so she’ll be upstairs with the other two giggling and screeching all day with that “stuff” they call music blaring.”

Phase 3 – …..

Got to wait til tomorrow for phase three (hint: been there done that, getting the tee shirt in a few more years) and my look ahead into (God I love Star Trek!) “Where no man has gone before.” (Cue the orchestra, cue the Orchestra, quick)

Today’s brain teaser who used to say “TTFN”? Winner gets a secret report on the final 2008 United States election results,…next week!



  1. Loved it, looking forward to the next installment, excellent work, my friend.

  2. Ta Ta For Now-Tigger from Winnie the Pooh. A phrase I use often 🙂

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