“…whether tis nobler to buy it (and have the wife throw a nutty, “You already have that damn Blackberry, what the hell do you need an i-Phone for?”), or suffer the slings and arrows of an outrageous public, (“Man that 7100i is like so old,… hell cavemen used them to communicate when hunting Mastedons,…you know?”)
It’s a disease, this technology thing, I’m convinced. Do I need an i-Phone, NO, does it have any significant advantage for me,…NO, do I have the extra coin,…(well, for the phone, I could make it happen,.. but a two year AT&T network committment on top of the remaining 18 months left on my B’berry network contract? NO)
“But self,..I WANT IT!”
“Look I’m the damn voice of reason here, and I said NO!”
“You always loved me better when I was asleep”
“You’re damn right, that was the only time I ever got any rest from you and you’re crazy ideas and stuff.”
“Yeah,….well if you won’t let me get an i-phone I’m gonna hold my breath until I pass out! There!”
“I’d suggest you go sit on the couch before you pass out, I ain’t gonna save your sorry butt, ..and the answer is still NO!”
But why not?”
“Because you have a perfectly good Blackberry 7100i, aside from watching movies the B’barry is more effective, it will synch with Microsoft Outlook, Calendar, etc. the i-Phone won’t, you got an i-Pod so there’s your tunes, and I don’t want to argue about this anymore,….go to your “pit” until you can be civilized and logical again,…what would Mr. Spock think, the way you are behaving?”
“I don’t care, since I bought that book, “My iPhone” I really want one.”
“One minute I let you out of my sight at Barnes and Noble and look what happens! Take the book back you don’t have an i-Phone, you are most definately not getting one, and you wasted your money on that book,…take it back.”
“No!”
“So what are you going to do, put the book up to your ear and ppretend you’re talking to someone, or fan the pages so it looks like a cartoon? Come on, grow up here,…No i-Phone. Period! That’s it, it’s all over do you understand?”
“Well,….what about,…”
“Which word did you not understand, over, finished, or done? You are begining to aggravate me now. Go,…up to the pit and stop grumbling!”
” It’s nopt fair I’m telling you, you damn consciences are all alike, you’re mean.” (Stomp,stomp,stomp, up the stairs)
Boy do I hate getting in these arguments with myself when I first get up. You’d think I’d be nice enough to let me get my first cup of coffee in me before I start arguing with him,…..and why does he always win? I got rights too you know.
-30-
The Emerald Rose 
Leave a Reply