Posted by: guinness222 | November 13, 2008

“Hey, I’m in “penny stocks”, …but they didn’t used to be that way!”

Yes sir boys and girls I’m in penny stocks! Orignally they were $23 -$45 stocks, but now they are penny stocks! Who would have ever thought that the Ford Motor Company, Henry Ford, one of the most inventive and industrial giants of our time, wouold now be selling for $1.84 per share! And what about General Electric, another “rock solid” company that is going for a mere $16.29 a share.
I’ve developed a “bad habit” in the last month, I finish work at 4:00pm, head to the Pub, meet up with two or three guys whom I’m friends with and watch the CNN Finacial channel and discuss the days market events and causes. We watch the “talking heads” of the financial markets, we study the “ticker ribbon” running on the bottom of the screen with the trades and after hours trades occuring around the world, and I am learning! Learning what you say? Well here’s what I’ve learned in the past couple of weeks;
1. Nobody knows a damn thing about what’s happening really, and they are all far from constipated!
2. The government hasn’t got a clue, and they are just running amok in the “Master Control Room” pushing anything that looks like a button!
3. My local “investor friends” are completely unsure of what to do and as my friend Carl is fond of saying, they are getting “spanked” badly every day. (I always ask him the difference between a spanking and a beating. He tells me both are painful, but as long as you can call it a “spanking” you haven’t started hemmoraging that badly,that you are aware of,….yet!)
4. Some people have too damn much money for thier own good, or have done the calculations and decieded exactly how many more days they can live without having to get a “job”.
5. Since no one is really sure who, or what is “pulling the strings” they are all trying to “out think” who ever it is. (I know a Time-share salesman who quit selling timeshares and with a buddy they are now “day-trading” – Day-trading is the art of buying stock, then selling it all in the same day, so you never have any money left in the “stock pot” at the end of the day. Buy it for $1.00 a share, sell it for $1.02, you just made a 2% profit on your investment, and you are out and could care less what happens to the other “smucks”! Obviously these guys don’t like “Kumbaya” as a theme song.)
6. A little thing like a message going across the bottom of the screen like “Heng-Sein opens down 8%” at 6 in the evening makes a collective “groan” louder than the background Pub music.
7. When you are a little guy like me, you do the prudent thing. you call your broker, like I did four weeks ago, and you say very simply: “Sell everything and put the cash in my money marlet account,….and I mean everything!” Then you go to Church and say a lot of prayers.

“Well Bob, that’s today’s Market Update.”
“Well Charlie I hope that leaves our IRA’s a little better off.”
“Bob, are you (expletive deleted) stupid! Didn’t you understand a word I said for the last five minutes?”
“Ahh,…well,…aah, my broker watches that stuff for me, it’s over my head.”
“Well Bob, …that “gurgle, gurgle, gurgle” sound it your broker going down for the third time, with whatever is left of you investment portfolio,…you’re busted, broke, kaput, out of money.”
“But I can’t be, the hair replacement surgury is already scheduled for me, and I just bought a new boat!”
“Bob,…you better take whatever is in your pocket and take swimming lessons, you’re going down too,….,….Bob? Where did he go Lindsey?”
“I’m not sure I was having my make up fixed so the mole on my chin doesn’t show so much,…why?”
“Nevermind, I’m going to the Pub!”



  1. I must say this is a great article i enjoyed reading it keep the good work 🙂

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s


%d bloggers like this: