The Emerald Rose

For the many years that I have Been a bartender at Fraternal Organizations, Weddings,Fund raisers, and at my own Country Western Club, and my Irish Pub, “The Emerald Rose”, I thought I’d heard it all,…..BUT I haven’t even scratched the surface when I chat with other fellow bartenders, or as is my hobby now in “in quasi retirement”, I never cease to be even more amazed. Just sitting at the bar with a “Pint o’ Guinness”, and my iPad!

So what about it? Well this past weekend my wife and I went to our local “Emerald Coast Theatre Company”, to see a limited engagement of a one woman play called ” Bad Dates”. To the summary, first it is OUTSTANDING, full of energy, action, AND the time flew by,….it hits all the buttons, for both men and women, and the “sassier” the actress the better the play. And I was still smiling after we got home, (and chuckling in my sleep), I”m sure.

The thought that struck me as we were walking to the car was, “Boy! Just like a confidential chat with the bartender’s and their patrons minds, (or lack thereof!) They see it all and they hear it all. You don’t have to write a word of fiction,…..just the real life observations of “the bartenders”. It is fact NOT fiction!!

The next day the concept was still rolling around in my head (kind of like a loose marble in the A/C ducts)! What if “IT WERE A ONE MAN SHOW TOO! Ooh-oh, I felt like an “evil” little thought invaded my head,……but a BIG smile broke out on my face, and the little voice in my head said “TRY IT!!”

FACT: as I am writing this idea, the two guys next to me, both construction workers are having a discussion with the bartender about the way their Fathers kept them on the straight and narrow, one guy made mention of a mistake he had made, and his Father wanted to discipline him so he would remember his mistake for a long time. So he put a 12″ piece of duct tape on his right arm, from the elbow down, and said “You think what you did was alright”, as the guy told him “I told him it was just a joke.”, and his Dad pulled the strip of Duct tape off his arm! It was when he was first beginning to grow hair on his forearm!! Everyone laughed at him, including himself. Lesson taught, Lesson earned,….FOREVER!!

I started thinking about the “staging” of the play. I wanted the Bartender to be the Primary actor , talking to the audience, but not disrupting the “customers” ( who are reduced to a “mumbling background” while the “Bartender” is speaking to the audience).

All it would take for staging is a typical bar lighting (but bright enough for the audience to see clearly) , and a “mike” on the bartender, that could be adjusted to an increased volume over the rest of the folks in the bar. When the bartender wanted to “talk to the audience” the floor behind the bar would raise the bartender up about 12″ to 18″ so he would be highly visible and a spotlight on him, and a diminished light level on the rest of the patrons and characters.

The play should focus on the bartender, his injected thoughts, his need to acquiesce to the patrons opinions and thought “preserve the peace, make drinks and manage the folks who have a tendency to get out of hand.

A whole act about handling the level of booze the patrons are consuming, the eccentricities of each, (since the Bartender has to know “how much” is enough for every one of the patrons,…..or the place gets “busted” for over serving, and the restaurant or bar as well as the bartender get fined or penalized for “over serving”.

A whole range of characters, stories and outcomes is a very fertile field upon which to “plant the seeds” of a great crop of “self written” variations to keep the play fresh and new for the audience.

Love to hear your comments,…..but I’ve already begun to write the first version of my play, called “Conversations at the Pub”!

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March 11, 2019

Tom Corcoran a/k/a “Mr.Guinness”